OK, so I know saying that while sharing the oh, so perfect picture of my attitude the summer I turned one isn’t fair.

And I’m not kidding. Don’t call me cute.

It’s a boundary I have.

Intellectually, I know it’s not rational. For me, the rationality (or lack thereof) doesn’t change the reality that being called cute as an adult clenches my jaw, pulls my shoulder to my knees, and generally encourages outwardly direct violence.

So, when people call me cute, I say, “Please don’t call me cute.”

Sometimes people ask why. Sometimes I tell them.

Sometimes the request isn’t understood, and they call me cute again. The language shifts to “Don’t call me cute.”

And that’s when maintaining this boundary I have becomes interesting.

Boundaries: Characteristics of interaction, environment, and context that establish what parts of me show up in a space.

What Are Boundaries?

From the big picture perspective, we deploy boundaries as defenses to keep ourselves safe and stable. Visible defensive boundaries include:

• Asking for what you need.
• Limiting your engagement with a situation.
• Agreeing with another person about how your relationship will work, whether platonic…